Today a child died, apparently because of circumcision – is it selfish to debate that?


By Lena Nyhus

This morning I awoke to the story of Brayden Tyler Frazier. It was reported from numerous respectable sources that his death was caused by circumcision.

Darin Frazier with baby Brayden

I looked into the story and chose to quote Jospeph4GI (The Angry Intactivist) when I posted the story to ‘Just a Snip’ and Intact Denmark on Facebook. Joseph wrote a strong but respectful blog-post about baby Brayden called Circumcision death: Yet another one (I hate writing these).

Apparently, little Brayden was circumcised Wednesday this week – 9 days old. During the circumcision he started bleeding. Although Brayden was given transfusions, plasma and numerous of other treatments, it was impossible to stop the bleeding and two days after his circumcision, he died, 11 days of age. As it turned out he was a bleeder, a haemophiliac. Brayden was not the first bleeder to die from circumcision and most likely he will not be the last.

I chose to let the family’s own picture of Brayden accompany the story. I found the picture shared many places on Facebook and visited the grandfathers own page, from where the picture was shared, the page was open and the picture shared more than 100 times.

Is it ethical to share his story, his name and his picture? I asked myself before I posted the story. Or should I rather write about the sorrow, the frustration and the rage that fills me, when I read about him? Should I quote some of the very strong comments I have read here and there or should I rather choose the informative approach?

Parents want the best for their children, I’ve always thought, and doctors act in the best interest of their patients. Of course there are some absolutely horrible exceptions to that rule of thumb, but I think, generally it’s true. However, some people simply don’t know enough about what circumcision really is and the risks involved with the procedure to begin with. I was important to me to convey the story of Brayden’s death because it help to prevent other children’s suffering and death. That way his death would not be in vain.

I wasn’t alone, hundreds of intactivists shared Braydens story and even more responded with comments, most of the comments were caring and kind Tragic. Heartbreaking. others were more extreme WTH!!!…These so-called ‘Parents’ should be tried for MURDER!!!!, this prompted the Grandfather to issue a statement

It’s sad that some people would exploit our family tragedy for their own purposes. Those who have repeatedly shared a false story about the circumcision being responsible for BRAYDEN’S death have only compounded our pain. It is unfortunate that people who misinterpreted or misconstrued a post on his condition have chosen to make him the “poster child” for their cause. While I respect all people’s rights to their beliefs, including those who choose not to circumcise their child, you do your cause a grave disservice when you promulgate a story filled with lies, and even refuse to take down your posts after being contacted privately and asked to. If you truly care so much about people and “…getting the truth out”, then take down any posts associated with the loss of my grandson that attributes his passing falsely to that procedure.
From the Grandfather~

Have I been posting lies? I asked myself. The answer was NO. Loudly and clearly NO. What I have shared and what I have seen shared is the grandfathers own words and pictures, from his own open Facebook profile, the vast majority of comments have been those of compassion, sorrow and frustration. The grandfather himself propagated Brayden’s story. He provided facts about Brayden’s treatment and the cause of his death.  And now he is defending circumcision in his statement.

When I posted Brayden’s story initially, I did it with sorrow, compassion and respect for his family and their loss, now, I must admit, that respect is rapidly dwindling. The grandfathers Facebook page is still open. The pictures of Brayden are still on it. He has issued a statement calling the descriptions of the circumstances of Braydens death lies, but the facts that are being spread, all come from him and in it he defends circumcision.

Brayden Tyler Frazier - circumcision death

My compassion with Brayden remains, my commitment to work to prevent similar horrible and completely avoidable deaths is strengthened, but I find it increasingly difficult to understand and respect the grandfathers actions.

I understand he is in sorrow, I understand that Brayden’s death must be a horrible shock to him and his family, but is not possible to pick and chose responses from people on the internet.

I would never have reposted Braydens story with mention of his name or use of his picture, if his family had not had an open profile. A profile that remains open to this time. I would most likely never have known the story surrounding his death, had his family not posted it to Facebook. Still, I would have considered taking the story off my pages, following the grandfathers statement, out of respect. But he calls me and the fellow intactivists liars. That we are not.

We work with absolutely no benefit to ourselves to save children, who will never thank us, who will probably never know we existed, simply because we care about their bodily integrity, simply because we respect their human rights, simply because we understand that a circumcision removes healthy tissue with great importance to adult sexuality, simply because we have read the studies that demonstrate long term physical and psychological effects of the assault to the children’s genitals, simply because we know that circumcision is never ‘Just a Snip’ but always genital mutilation.

Braydens sacrifice should not be silenced into non-existence. The truth is that on occasion circumcision kills. As intactivists we work to save lives. Let’s end circumcision of children – both boys and girls. Lets change the world – one child at a time.

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77 thoughts on “Today a child died, apparently because of circumcision – is it selfish to debate that?

  1. No preoperative coagulation screening whatsoever precedes this “emergency” surgery, just controversial dosage of Vitamin K. And according to the Facebook post he is now with his hero the Abrahamic god?

  2. Lawyers representing the doctor who carried out the surgery and the clinic or hospital will no doubt try to browbeat the grieving family into accepting payment without going to court and on the condition they absolve the doctor and clinic of any liability and they keep quiet about the incident. This will, in all likelihood, be swept under the rug, written off as an unfortunate incidence of where the operation was a success, but the patient died anyway; the amputation of the boy’s prepuce followed by death by exsanguination were unrelated.

  3. Leave this poor family alone!! People circumsize now adays! The babys death may not have been b/c of circumcision. This is none of youre biss, this family has suffered enough! My prayers are with them. You cold hearted people have nothing better to do then make this familys life worse. Good, well their will be a time when one of your loved ones dies & i hope u get harrased & not be able to grief the way u want to like this family!!! If u dont agree in circumcision thats fine but dont rash on this poor family & steal pictures of a baby that died! You ppl are sick to post pictures of a newborn child who died unexpectally…

    • Hi Sam

      I would never rejoice in the death of anyone, by threatening me and my loved ones you have disqualified yourself from any debate with me.

      – Lena

    • Sick? I will tell you what is sick. Intact, unharmed men show the glans only when erect. A cut penis shows the glans always. What people wish to see baby genitals that looks as if the child was aroused? You people should not have custody of any children, since you will risk their lives just because you can. Stop harming children! Stop threatening people who report the truth! Stop harressing people! America is already waking up to the truth and stopped messing with baby-genitals, cut babies are a minority by now.

  4. People circumcise for the best for their child. Complications can come w/ not being circumcised! My friend has had serous issues from not being circumsised when he was a chilod & hates his parents now for not circ. him b/c kids made fun of him n call him “breadstick” & he cant find a g/f b/c the girls think its gross!! I myself circumcised my son for the best for my child & he was perfectly fine. Doctors wouldnt recomend it if there was a greater chance of risk being circumsized verse no being circumcised

    • Hi Sam

      I would never rejoice in the death of anyone, by threatening me and my loved ones (like you did in you previous post) you have disqualified yourself from any debate with me.

      – Lena

    • Well in that case parents who circumcise their girls have “good intentions” too.

      Not cutting a girl in the cultures where they cut girls means she will never marry or be anyone on society.

      So your “friend” (I’m assuming you’re not making him up?) had a problem that needs surgery. Surgery when it is needed is usually the way medicine works.

      Are you aware that 70% of the worlds male population is intact? And of the 30% that are circumcised, less than one percent actually needed it for medical reasons? Most cut guys are cut out of tradition or custom.

      Let’s see, would you remove your son’s prostate? According to the American cCancer Society, one in six US men will get prostate cancer. And it’s oh so traumatic as an adult!

      Yes?

      No?

      Additionally, no respected medical organization recommends the circumcision of infants. Check the AAP fine print.

      The AAP says the “benefits” aren’t enough.

      So no, circumcision is NOT recommended. That’s why most people outside the states aren’t cut and think we’re nuts.

    • To Sam: Then why doesn’t your “friend” (if he exists) schedule the operation with one of the many doctors who’d be happy to perform it on a consenting adult?

    • Your friend is one of a tiny majority of people who would have an issue with not being circumcised. Doctors actually don’t recommend circumcision…if you did any research in the slightest, you would find that the American Academy of Pediatrics DOES NOT recommend circumcising. Unfortunately, as you may not realize, doctors get a lot of money from performing circumcisions so any who do recommend are doing so only with their selfish interests or mind OR they have not done any recent research that shows that the reasons for doing circumcision back in the day have been discovered to be unfounded. There is not one shred of evidence that proves it is beneficial. Please get your facts straight before you argue a point. I think posting information about the tragedies surrounding circumcision are only done to try to prevent other innocent little boys from having the same fate. I feel sorry for your son; hopefully he does not grow up to be as close-minded as you.

    • Doctors DON’T recommend it. Even the AAP doesn’t. (And though it says the benefits are greater than the risks, it does that without having compared them – let alone with the great benefits and tiny risks of having all one’s body – and by ignoring the risks of major complications and death.) Your friend didn’t have “serious issues from not being circumcised”, He had issues with a normal part of his body, just as anyone can with any part. We could cut off all babies’ earlobes and prevent any chance of disorders there – but we don’t. He should find girls who aren’t airheads, like most of the developed world’s women, outside the USA.

    • 1. Pediatrician and National Children’s Ombudsman of Norway http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=74NJSOjBTNI (7 min.)

      Dr. Anne Lindboe discusses children’s rights and circumcision. Says: she has seen the complications, the pain is as mush as adults, there’s no problem waiting until older, saving money is not important in saving children, circ. is a form of violence, children should be protected from violence, circumcision is not a harmless procedure.

      2. Child Circumcision: An Elephant in the Hospital http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ceht-3xu84I

      3. Circumcision is Child Abuse by Aldin Entertainment Music Group http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mJVR_BBKncI

    • You are ignorant. Death is not a complication that comes from remaining intact. This baby would be alive if doctors had not deliberately taken a knife to his body. Your intact friend is ALIVE to speak of his genital issues, and now that he is an adult, its HIS choice if he wants to cut his genitals. There are women that appreciate intact penises, he can find someone that respects his body as is. You are lucky your son is fine, there are many children that do survive the surgery but end up mutilated beyond repair and have serious emotional issues as well. There is no way the benefit of Routine Infant Circumcision outweighs the risk of remaining intact. Doctors want money- that is why they perform this procedure on healthy infants, just as they prescribe drugs and injections that make us more sick than they do us good. There are rare instances that circumcision is medically necessary, but when its not necessary, its important keep the penis intact for many many reasons. Do some research.

  5. If this truly did happen, then it’s really sad that ANYONE is blogging about the unfortunate death of a child! It’s disrespectful to take someone’s photo’s and save them to your own computer to use them in your own cause. I don’t care if the profile is open to the public, a lot of profiles are OPEN, but the photo’s are copyright to the person that actually snapped them! That’s like saving someones personal default photo because all of those are open to the public and using it for whatever you want. Not to mention, Intactivists have a certain way of twisting words and trying to turn things into what they want. Have a heart for fucks sake and let the family mourn!

    • Hi Rachel

      If sharing baby Braydens story can prevent one single of the approximately 117+ infant deaths, that occur in America every year, it’s the right thing to do. Brayden’s grandfather has taken the time to describe his grandson’s condition quite thoroughly, I have had the description assessed by several medical professionals from cultures, in which genital mutilation of children is not the norm, here medical professionals would be charged with malconduct if they cut into a child with clotting problems. Perhaps Brayden’s own life could have been saved, if his parents had known how many children suffer complications or even death from the needless and very invasive surgery that circumcision is.

      – Lena

      • Many intactivists twisted his words and that is so sad. You’re using it for your cause, the family be damned I guess (if this even happened, I still have my doubts). The fact is, there are a lot of people that will never change their mind on the matter. Now I can respect your opinion, however, what do you think is going to happen in the future? Let’s just say you get your way and they ban simple infant circumcision, what is next? How about we ban abortions or put a limit on how many children you can have? How about they tell us that we HAVE to vaccinate our children no matter what (this is highly controversial). What about putting a ban on Co-Sleeping because it can be considered inappropriate behavior with children? Then there is the breastfeeding topic. What if they put a ban on public breastfeeding and/or insist you use formula because some people think it’s just plain yucky? Oh and hey don’t forget about homeschooling…that’s not good for your child so make them go to public school! The list goes on. I’m off topic but whatever, it is what it is, and this blog post and any other blog posts and/or social networking sites that stole these pictures are wrong for doing it like this! There are other ways to pimp out your cause. Shame! I hope all of you remember this one day when you’re dealing with a personal tragedy involving your child/children. Karma will be ready for you.

      • Does this mean that you would suggest lifting the ban on female genital cutting? Or are girls somehow more deserving of protection against genital mutilation than boys?
        – Lena

      • Lena just keep on publishing the truth, keep on saving children. There are so many parents who silently watch and who care for their child much more than for any ideas like circ is one. You are saving babies, you can be proud of yourself.

    • Unfortunately, that’s not how photos on Facebook work.

      Where on earth did you study copyright law?

      The father should have though twice before posting his family’s affair in public.

      Once something has been posted to the Internet, it can’t be un-posted.

      That’s just the way the cookie crumbles.

      What’s disrespectful to this child is lying about this child’s cause of death to preserve a comforting lie for the family, and letting the charlatans that did this get away Scott free.

    • Rachel why don’t you have a heart and try to stop this from happening again. The only way that will happen is for people to, understand what happened and speak out. The victim here is Brayden and he deserves a voice, for fucks sake!

      • Exactly. These people seem to not realise that this is not a doll but a person who was wronged. If I was killed by doctors failures and everyone tried to cover up the truth, I would be glad that somebody did speak up for me. Too bad that the family and friends of the family seem to not get the concept. Justice for Brayden!

    • Intactivists have twisted NOTHING.

      The grandfather’s own words speak for themselves.

      As a god fearing man, he should know better than to lie and accuse others of raising false testimony; he is raising false testimony himself.

      You use the logical fallacy of the false comparison.

      How is circumcision like vaccination, exactly?

      I challenge you to name a single virus the circumcised man is immune against.

      How is banning the forced circumcision of minors like banning the choice of an adult woman to an abortion, and not like giving the woman a choice?

      The abortion argument is a red herring; neither side can argue consistently in favor of circumcision. A child’s right to life does include the right to his body, and “my body my choice” applies to BOTH genders.

      As Lena has asked, what do you think about the federal ban on female circumcision?

      Maybe you think it should be lifted because it infringes on parental and religious rights?

    • Do you never read newspapers? Honestly they are full of people of unfortunate deaths. I will not even go into all the swear words you use. You can be against human rights all you want, however, that will not change opinions. It will just show that much more education is needed.

  6. You’re an idiot. what are you going to change? This ver invasive sometimes dangerous and even fewer times fatal operation is already no longer recommended in the hospital I’m guessing because its npt necessary but they are legally allowed to add the: “however it is more suseptable to infection blah blah blah” your taking a mourning innocent families photos to exploit your beleifs makes you a retarded reporter using a mans facebook as your seemingly only information source.. and you still aren’t doing anything but contradicting everything you just said.. apparently cuz that’s what the facebook page says.. be a better investigator for fucks sake!

      • Ah.. i see well if that is your particular rebuttal to my acusations i feel i have already won. peace & love live with you. bye.

      • YAY… I’ve come to that place on the internet, where logic reigns supreme -and moronic answers like: “i feel i have already won.” Is actually getting slapped, as it should be! (btw* the “i” as in “(You-Amanda)” should be a capital letter – I’m pretty sure, despite my stupid agnostic brain and all!)

        ( * – “btw” IS a commonly used abbreviation. as opposed to some of those, used by “SAM” …I can’t help but to suspect, that there could be a connection between the grammer imposed upon an open debate, and the solidity of the imposers opinion?)

        (Also: Does the abuse of the language -when using “Cuz” or “b/c”, instead of “because”, constitute a “Cussing”? I’m sure you’ll spot all the mistakes I’ve made here and send them Right back at me, with vengence! Help yourselves. 😀

  7. Deaths and accidents are reported everyday in the newspaper and on TV. How is the death of this child any different? Should the media not report on deaths, however tragic, to protect grieving families??

    • The difference is, when mainstream media reports a death, they are not supposed to twist the circumstances of the death to fit their personal agendas. I feel that is what is happening here. A severely hemophilic infant could bleed out internally from ruptured blood vessels, or from a needle stick as easily as they could from a circumcision. To blame this childs death on a circumcision, without direct proof of that is twisting the outcome to match your agenda.

  8. The death of the baby is very sad and no matter what your beliefs or the fact that you felt you were sharing pertinent information you should not have taken the pictures from the fb page. The family is grieving, i can’t imagine their pain right now. Possibly the grandfather misspoke or maybe didn’t have all the relevant facts…how will you feel if it turns out the baby’s death had nothing to do with the circ and you’ve made such a big grand deal about it….i think the best approach at this point might be to lock the comments and let the matter rest and let the family grieve in peace..

    • In the grandfather’s own words the baby was not producing “clotting” materials prior to the bleeding. Do you find it responsible of the doctors to perform an unnessessary cosmetic procedure on a child which was bleeding for more than two days prior to the procedure, and do you not find it of paramount importance to prevent similar deaths?

      “Darin FrazierMarch 9, 2013 at 6:53 PM

      I am Brayden’s grandfather. These are the facts (without giving you every detail)…Brayden had been ill and taken to the Dr. for 2 days prior to the circumcision…sleeping constantly and not eating. The parents also had noticed that his initial sticks and pricks had not healed quickly, and most bandages were kept on him for 2+ days before the wounds sealed. It appeared his body was not producing “clotting” materials prior to the circumcision, but it wasn’t so much that anyone was alarmed….”

      – Lena

      • I didn’t read through the whole story so ok I can see that point…however I still stand by what I said that you should not have taken the pictures off the FB page and that at this point the family should left to their grief in peace

      • I respect your opinion Jennifer and I have definitely had my concerns, however, I do find the need to prevent deaths must be prioritised. I do find it very important to not point fingers at families (or medical professionals) who circumcise in ignorance, but hundreds of studies have demonstrated time after time, that circumcision (which removes 10.000-40.000 sensory organs from the penis and the protective and sexual functionality of the foreskin) is a potentially harmful procedure, which bears with it the risk of potential short term and long term complications ranging from Post Traumatic Stress Disorder over sexual dysfuntion to ultimately death.

        Luckily circumcision rates are plummeting in the States, partly because of the work of highly dedicated scientists, who have researched the consequences of this procedure and partly because of the unstoppable effort by intactivists, who have worked tiredlessly for years and years to inform the public.

        Granted, a few intactivists are rude and generally unpleasant, but that is an absolute minority and I think you must admit (perhaps based on some name calling in this comment thread) that some pro-circs are rude and generally unpleasant as well. That sort of behaviour should never be accepted.

        Over all the intactivist community is a loving and caring community of people who promote respect for children, bodily integrity and peaceful parenting. Circumcision is a transgression of several articles in the UN’s declarations of human rigths and childrens rights as well as a genuine threat to the child’s life and health, as we have recognised it with female circumcision byt the way.

    • Well said, Jennifer!
      I don’t think she’ll lock the post or remove it though, as she should! She stole a photo and that right there is disrespectful and I’m pretty sure it could be illegal if you got a lawyer to take a look at it.

      • People always say “But circumcision never kills anyone.” Here’s a case where it has. Ignoring that won’t bring back the poor little boy.

      • When someone publishes a photo on Facebook set on “public” anyone may copy it. (in fact FB claims the rights, and people have found their photos being used on advertisements for products they don’t approve of). Only one or two hotheads have blamed the family.

        Those really to blame are the circumcision advocates (including the AAP) who play down the risks, giving doctors and families a false sense of security about circumcison.

    • No,

      The father should have thought twice before posting on Facebook.

      No one is breaking any privacy here.

      What’s disturbing and shameful is how much others want to help this family lie to itself for comfort.

      It is undeniable the child would not stop bleeding after his circumcision.

      That’s like claiming a person bled to death through a gunshot wound, and the gun had nothing to do with it.

      I say too many boys gave died, and too many circumcision deaths like this one have been swept underneath the carpet.

      It’s time to speak out on behalf of the weak and defenseless.

      The truth needs to be spoken no matter who it pisses off.

  9. A little too soon, you think?
    You’re talking about HUMAN RIGHTS, well, its everyones right to choose whether circ is acceptable for THEIR children. I have 3 boys and none of them are circ’d… It’s not for us… HOWEVER, you don’t see me shoving my beliefs down anyones throat and acting like it’s the RIGHT way, just because it’s my way. Your way of thinking may be right for YOU… but not for everyone. Perhaps you should do you’re own parenting thing and let others parent the way they see fit!!! And how DARE you use this innocent families tragedy for your own personal gain or “influence” on anyone else’s way of thinking. That in itself is totally unacceptable and for the love of GOD, that man just lost his grandson, what in the hell makes you think the first thing on his mind is to LOCK his facebook account? Would that be on the top of YOUR to-do list (God forbid) the situation was reversed? Get over yourself.

    • Hi Tiffany

      Parents do not own their children and – just as it is the case with girls – it is not the parents right to inflict bodily harm on their boys.

      The child has an individual right to bodily integrity and a circumcision is unnessessary and cannot be undone, therefore it simply should not be done, unless there is a medical indication that makes it necessary and all other relevant treatments have been tried.

      Parents do not have the right to take away a vital part of their children’s future sexuality and certainly not the right to risk the boy’s lives to please the parent’s aesthetic preferences.

      • you still haven’t answered my question. And yes, it is the parents decision. The same way its the parents decision on whether to vaccinate or not. Simple as that. Just as passionate as you are AGAINST circ. Others are just as passionate FOR it.

      • Our children are ours in responsibility only, at no point in time do we actually own them or their bodies. Yes, as parents we have to do what we feel is in their best interest until they can make the decision for themselves, but with all the access to information available to anyone within an internet connection, there is no excuse to not know not only the immediate risks of circumcision, but the long term damage done to the man their son will become.On average, one boy every three days dies in the US of circumcision. This story is tragic, as is every boy that turns into a statistic from this culturally accepted form of child abuse. I applaud you for helping his story out. Thank you.

    • Tiffy,

      What do you think about female circumcision?

      Do you think we have a right to go to Africa and tell parents they are mutilators?

      Is it a parents right here too?

      Or is this “different?”

      Let’s see how far you take your own words.

    • I would also like to know Tiffany if you feel the same way about female circumcision. Or does this parental decision apply to boys only?

    • “its everyones right to choose whether circ is acceptable for THEIR children.” – except girls? If not, why not? And severity is not the issue, when female “circumcision” (sparing the clitoris itself) can be less damaging than male circumcision. (In fact in 2010 the AAP proposed a token ritual nick for girls “much less extensive than neonatal male genital cutting” but it was howled down and withdrew the policy within a month.)
      How about “it’s everyone’s right to choose whether genital cutting is acceptable for THEM” when they are old enough to choose? Very, very few ever do.

      • To me circ on boys as committed in the USA since the 1800s looks like pseudo-castration. It is disturbing, violent and these families create their own problems that way. Some are even surprised when they see a baby, calm, smiling, never crying loudly. They do not even know this. I have lost a big part of sympathie for americans over this human rights offense on their own children.

    • But you think it okay for others to shove their beliefs down another’s throat. Do you think it okay to cut off parts of someone’s body without their permission? Y/N. Circumcision is a sign of slavery. It’s a sign of the covenant (means to cut a contract by halving animals and walk in the pathway of their blood. May this happen to me should a break this contract). So you think it all good and right to force circumcise, to use children’s bodies as billboards, advertising forced beliefs of religion, parents, and society. So you believe, “It’s my kid. It’s my penis. Get your hands off my penis.”, quoting one mother’s anger over being educated upon her questions. The truth of circumcision is the more you know the worse it is. This caring mother stood to ask questions even though at times she yelled at us and called us names. She ended up sitting on the sidewalk in the gutter crying. Very sad. It’s sad for everyone. So it breaks our heart when another child dies or has his penis made a stub or less, or an hourglass from a Plastibell ring. When young men have their first wet dream which is erotic but hurts and finds blood mix with semen because they took too much off resulting in tearing his frenulum. Unnerved and embarrassed these men usually don’t tell their parents. Circumcision makes men quite. It’s meant to do that, to control. Those who circumcise don’t want it discussed or even voted on. see SFMGMbill.org. It’s “just a bit of skin” which is as much as they allow you to keep minus the benefits of 16+ functions lost to circumcision. Do we all agree, the bod is the primary platform to communication? Do we all agree sexual intercourse is communication? Yes, then having half of the most erogenous, innervated, specialized skin gone, is going to limit full communication.

    • You’re saying stop talking about circumcision and death. Don’t say anything relevant. Are you against my grieving for this boy? I want this unnecessary loss of life, trauma for all, to stop. If you don’t talk about it, it will keep happening. Please talk and better yet show you care. I feel best to not bother the family. Erecting a public memorial for Brayden is the best I can do and did so with other members of Bay Area Intactivists.

    • Boy knowing you feel this way about shoving beliefs down someone’s throat with words and pictures, what must you feel about those shoving beliefs down someone’s throat by slicing off their sexual parts, saying this is fundamental to our religion. But afterwards saying now we can get to more important things. Abby Michelson Porth Defends Male Genital Mutilation http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IueQb4KDuI0
      Or what about these same people pushing for society to pay for circumcision even religious. That’s some serious throat swallowing. (From http://www.circumstitions.com/Schoens.html) Tell me how much you like Dr, Edgar Schoen

      Former Chair of the AAP Taskforce on Circumcision tht produced the AAP’s 1989 policy
      1.
      Published in
      AMERICAN JOURNAL OF DISEASES IN CHILDREN, VOL 141: 128. FEBRUARY 1987.
      Ode to the Circumcised Male
      We have a new topic to heat up our passions —
      the foreskin is currently top of the fashions.
      If you’re the new son of a Berkeley professor,
      your genital skin will be greater, not lesser.
      For if you’ve been circ’ed or are Moslem or Jewish,
      you’re outside the mode; you are old-ish not new-ish.
      You have broken the latest society rules;
      you may never get into the finest of schools.
      Noncircumcised males are the “genital chic”–
      if your foreskin is gone, you are now up the creek.
      It’s a great work of art like the statue of Venus*,
      if you’re wearing a hat on the head of your penis.
      When you gaze through a looking glass, don’t think of Alice;
      don’t rue that you suffered a rape of your phallus.
      Just hope that one day you can say with a smile
      that your glans ain’t passe; it will rise up in style.

      Here’s my three favorite videos:
      1. Pediatrician and National Children’s Ombudsman of Norway http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=74NJSOjBTNI (7 min.)

      Dr. Anne Lindboe discusses children’s rights and circumcision. Says: she has seen the complications, the pain is as mush as adults, there’s no problem waiting until older, saving money is not important in saving children, circ. is a form of violence, children should be protected from violence, circumcision is not a harmless procedure.

      2. Child Circumcision: An Elephant in the Hospital http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ceht-3xu84I

      3. Circumcision is Child Abuse by Aldin Entertainment Music Group http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mJVR_BBKncI

    • From your posting one can see, that you did not read the article that you commented on. How can you expect basic respect, if you do not show any? At least be polite enough to read the article. Or is it too long? And it also shows me, there need to be laws established, otherwise some people will not stop harming their own children.

  10. The sad case of the untimely death of Brayden Tyler Frazier should cause every parent to question just why the ancient ritual of male infant genital mutilation should continue in the 21st century. Had the baby boy not been cut in a totally unnecessary procedure, he would probably have survived infancy, although always at risk from injury. It is time that the law against cutting healthy tissue from boys was enforced, girls are protected, why aren’t boys? The reason should be obvious, doctors have been making money from American parents for more than 150 years, circumcision is a lucrative sideline for them, and ignorant parents have long been under their spell. All the indications were there to rule against surgery but were ignored. If parents heed this death and reject genital cutting, Brayden’s death will not have been in vain.

  11. Thank you, Lena. Thank you for saying what must be said.

    Deep, deep down, there is something very shameful about removing erogenous tissues from a child’s genitals and forever altering their appearance, function and pleasure-giving ability and for no legitimate medical reason whatsoever.

    When a child needlessly dies from this ‘cultural surgery’, the desire of the family and doctors to seek to erase or re-write history is understandable, but it is in no way acceptable.

    A comforting lie is often easier to tell and easier to hear than an uncomfortable truth.

    The truth is circumcision is always harmful, sometimes results in serious injury and occasionally results in death.

    http://www.cirp.org/library/death/

  12. Well said, Tiffany!

    Problem with asking questions to these people is that they will NEVER give you a direct answer. They were wrong in exposing this family and they will have to live with that disgusting act for the rest of their lives. I pity the things the blogger and her supporters are teaching their children. Once their rights are taken away, they might understand.

    • What do you teach your children by strapping them down and having erogenous tissue removed? That they have no rights. That they are not good enough the way they are. That their family is not protecting them from harm. That their genitals are bad. That they deserve no love. That they are victims, who´s cries remain unheard. And you want others to understand your point? Maybe as a mother you should 1. try to understand your child and 2. love and protect them the way they are.

    • And that you use the word “exposing” speaks volumes. Crimes are exposed. That is a fitting word. So did anyone here “expose” the family? Just because you feel like you have to hide your dirty secret of circ. on your helpless babies, that does not mean that people here “expose” others. The only thing exposed is the crime on children. If you do not want that exposed, just don´t commit or justify any.

    • You are getting direct answers; you are simply choosing to ignore them.

      That’s not our problem.

      Now, it would be wrong to NOT “expose” this family. Too many circumcision deaths get swept underneath the rug, and the lie that circumcision is “harmless” continues.

      The disgusting act is taking a knife and mutilating the organs of a healthy, non-consenting child.

      What do you pity?

      That we are teaching our children to love their bodies as they are?

      That they should not let what others have to say about their natural bodies get to them?

      To respect their own bodies and speak out for the defenseless?

      Are these really “disgusting” principles?

      If so, then the person who should be pitied is YOU.

      “Rights?”

      What “rights?”

      You mean like federal law forbids parents from cutting their daughters?

      Whose body is it?

      Whose rights?

      You don’t know the meaning of the word.

      Don’t lecture us on a word you don’t even have a grasp on.

  13. I’m talking about when i said, if (god forbid) this was YOUR situation, would your top priority to lock your facebook page?
    Culturally speaking, if thats what they believe in, then so be it, what I’m TRYING to point out here, is everyone has their own opinion and its very INAPPROPRIATE to post such hatred the SAME day the baby passed away. And, from what I understand coming from the grandfathers post that you posted on here was there were already pre-existing medical issues, so unless YOU are the coroner, I don’t want to hear your “It was because of the circumcision” BS

    Children die from child birth (and yes, I’m more than aware of that. My son was *almost* one of those babies.), would you like to convince people not to have babies because they might pass away from that too?

    • People who do not care for babies deaths are not fit to be parents. Of course Brayden died of circ. the parents have sort of, a right to denial, since they are grieving and need time to sort it all out. However whats with all the pro-cutters who jump out like Jack in the box to attack intactivists? Arent you supposed to protect children, instead of the ideal penis-notion? Also nobody posted hatred. Maybe you hated people like that and assume others are violent like that, too. Well you are wrong. Intactivists shed tears because of another dead child which could live. Your bulliying will not stop our compassion. Because we do it for the children, who have no other lobby than us.

    • “I’m talking about when i said, if (god forbid) this was YOUR situation, would your top priority to lock your facebook page?”

      You seem to be continuing to willfully ignoring the point.

      People need to think about what they expose to the world.

      Otherwise, stay offline.

      You see that on/off button right there? It’s so easy to hold it for five seconds, and your computer will turn off. See?

      Try it.

      “Culturally speaking, if thats what they believe in, then so be it, what I’m TRYING to point out here, is everyone has their own opinion and its very INAPPROPRIATE to post such hatred the SAME day the baby passed away.”

      So then, you agree that the federal ban on female circumcision should be lifted.

      Yes? No?

      “And, from what I understand coming from the grandfathers post that you posted on here was there were already pre-existing medical issues, so unless YOU are the coroner, I don’t want to hear your “It was because of the circumcision” BS.”

      Oh? Are you the coroner now?

      Here is the question; KNOWING the baby had pre-existing medical issues, WHY did the doctors proceed with the mutilation in the first place?

      Without medical or clinical indication, can a doctor even be performing surgery on a healthy, non-consenting minor? Much less be giving parents any kind of a “choice?”

      Yes, or no?

      “Children die from child birth (and yes, I’m more than aware of that. My son was *almost* one of those babies.), would you like to convince people not to have babies because they might pass away from that too?”

      You seem to be intent on making false comparisons.

      A childbirth is inevitable.

      Circumcising a healthy child is like childbirth HOW?

      Tell us, oh knowledgeable coroner.

  14. Circumcision has done me no favors! I have had bleeding abrasions from intercourse that a foreskin would have prevented. These made me leery of having sex with my wife. Without the mechanical lubrication provided by a foreskin, I have to use artificial lubricant or sex would be painful for my wife. My parent’s chose this painful and unsatisfactory sex life for me and my wife and I simply cannot fathom why. I would never have chosen to have my foreskin removed. Only 1/16,667 intact males will have a problem with their foreskin, 99% of which can be treated with medicine not surgery. 117 babies die from circumcision a year in the US that is 9/100,000 babies that die each year from a cosmetic surgery. Men have lost their penis, glans, and suffered from deformity caused by the operation. It isn’t right that these children pay the price for a decision their parents made, a decision that should be left up to the penis owner. Even those who survive still have problems like mine, though they are seldom discussed.

    My numbers and claims are supported by these studies:
    Dutch Medical society and their stance on RIC
    https://www.dropbox.com/s/dhipa1ei2rqj12q/KNMG-viewpoint-Non-therapeutic-circumcision-of-male-minors-27-05-2010-v2%20%281%29.pdf

    This document outlines the deaths caused by circumcision in the US.
    http://www.davidwilton.com/files/lost-boys—estimate-of-us-circumcision-related-deaths—bollinger-2010.pdf

    http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/moral-landscapes/201109/myths-about-circumcision-you-likely-believe

    http://www.courthousenews.com/2012/11/09/52144.htm

    http://www.cirp.org/library/statements/

  15. Here’s my three favorite intactivist videos: (memo I need to contact Tinari for his presentation video)
    1. Pediatrician and National Children’s Ombudsman of Norway http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=74NJSOjBTNI (7 min.)

    Dr. Anne Lindboe discusses children’s rights and circumcision. Says: she has seen the complications, the pain is as mush as adults, there’s no problem waiting until older, saving money is not important in saving children, circ. is a form of violence, children should be protected from violence, circumcision is not a harmless procedure.

    2. Child Circumcision: An Elephant in the Hospital http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ceht-3xu84I

    3. Circumcision is Child Abuse by Aldin Entertainment Music Group http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mJVR_BBKncI

  16. The people here (pro-cutters) who did not even read the article they commented on, show very well what sort of person they are. Violence in their language, threats against the author, it just shows what mentality is at work here.

    And yeah the majority of the civilised world thinks that you are bad parents, because you hurt and harm your children – just because you can. And you would rather go around and threaten and trying to silence people who educate others on the risks of routine infant circ. like you did here, instead of getting educated.

    You will never silence the truth.

  17. I have already contacted the family about so many using poor Brayden’s pictures WITHOUT permission. All it does is make us intactivists look like penis obsessed whackos, and if any of US were in his parents’ situations, we’d be PISSED that their image was being used without permission.
    Looks like I’m contacting the family AGAIN

    • Actually, if the label “penis obsessed” applies to anyone, the AAP comes to mind. The facile rationalizations in the organization’s zeal to defend the practice of cutting of newborn boys for no particular reason other than someone else wants it, contained in the very recent Circumcision Policy Statement, fly in the face of common sense if not common decency.

  18. I do not know these people and I sympathize with them; the loss of their newborn son is devastating. However, this does not change the fact that the easiest and most sensible thing that should have been done was to leave his body alone. Far from being “penis obsessed” intactivists counsel that children’s private parts, boys and girls, be left alone. Does the fact that the entire Western World via the UN and WHO campaigns to eradicate female genital cutting in societies where it is common cultural and religious practice, make us “vagina obsessed?”

  19. Megan, anything made available to the public does not require permission, consent, or notification of use as long as it’s used for noncommercial purposes.

    That aside, what the parents did was morally and ethically wrong, they made a decision that should have only been allowed to be made by the child when they grow up. And now they have to live with the consequences of their actions. I personally have no sympathy for the family, my sympathies go with the child who could not defend himself from what was forced on him.

  20. In the words of Margaret Mead “Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world; indeed, it’s the only thing that ever has.” Circumcision is an infringement of the children’s right to bodily integrity and in some cases simply the cause of their death. Societies all around the world will grow to realise that boys deserve the same basic human rights as girls and I personally will work hard to try to prevent future fatalities.

    Thank you to every one for participating in this debate, I will close it now, as I think all points of view have been brought to light.

    Dear fellow intactivists, I thank you in particular for the work you do every day. We are changing the world together – one child at a time.

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